|
|
|
|
|
Master Richard
Author: Chrissy@
|
| |
(Added on May 27, 2006)
(This month 61075 readers) (Total 85351 readers) |
| |
White couples are kidnaped and brought to a compound to be trained as slaves. The wives are breed with black guards and husband\'s are used as working slaves. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 5 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| 1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
| 0% |
0% |
20% |
0% |
20% |
0% |
0% |
20% |
0% |
40% |
|
Weighed
Average (?):  (7/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (3/10) |
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
mlyniam
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 1, 2007 |
| |
I wish it was finished. Only a couple of spelling/grammar errors. Could use more sex, instead of all the backstory, or better, both. (8/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
H Dean
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 1, 2006 |
| |
First, the use of a spell checker is fine so long as the words are correctly used. A quick sampling of errors: "than" where "then" was appropriate, "cattle proud", "was" instead of "were", These were repeated many times. Further, the sentence structure was poor, at best. The story, itself, was bland largely due to the writing style, which was sophomoric and lacked any sort of life. Poor phrasing of sentences was a huge contributor to that. Frankly, I don't think this story was edited beyond a spell check. Finally, the tale felt rushed. It was as if the author wrote this in a night and was so excited by the story that it was not given proper treatment. I suggest the author slow down; take some extra time in the crafting. If I rushed my stories, like this one appears to be, they would all receive hideous reviews. A solid telling can make a dull story spring to life. The converse is true, as well. (5/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
bondage_man69
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 28, 2006 |
| |
I don't think the author has heard of spell check! (3/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
donkotts
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 27, 2006 |
| |
This story has a great start (10/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 27, 2006 |
| |
very, very hot, well written i hope you post more very soon i can't wait (10/10)
|
|
|
About 