|
|
|
|
The Runaway
Author: DemonX
|
|
(Added on Mar 27, 2008)
(This month 9185 readers) (Total 21332 readers) |
|
Young girl seeks help from the father of her friend - only to find herself prey for his vengeance. |
Ratings and Reviews: |
Number
of Ratings: 4 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
0% |
0% |
25% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
50% |
25% |
0% |
|
Weighed
Average (?): (7/10) |
Average
Rating: (7/10) |
Highest
Rating: (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating: (3/10) |
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
jep33
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Nov 1, 2008 |
|
Overall, I thought the author displayed a talent to put words together. If English is his/her second language then I commend the author for having a better command of language and grammar than many who claim English as their primary language. There were a few words spelled so poorly that they destroyed a sentence. For example, “Mark gave her a light slab into the face.” I assume the author meant to use the word “slap” instead of “slab”. Another example, “ . . . and shacked her head roughly . . .” I assume here that the author intended to use the word “shook” instead of “shacked”. I liked the development of the characters that set the tone for their moods. However, I thought the buildup did not have a payoff that was worthy of the overall journey. But, again, I give credit for the author’s ability to string words together. I think there are good stories within this ability that are waiting to get out. (8/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
Mad Lews
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Apr 7, 2008 |
|
I'd agree you were mistreated by grinner666. For spelling all I could find was the use of dept. for debt, loose for lose, and perhaps frizzle for sizzle (depending on if the eggs were burnt,) I also suspect English may not be your first language because of some word choices. If that's the case you deserve a higher score from me. I'd suggest having a friend proof read your stories before posting just as a general rule to catch any minor glitches. This is a fine story and the problems are very minor. (8/10)
|
|
- Replied by:
DemonX
(Edit) (Apr 13, 2008)
- Hi,
you're right - English is not my first language. So I really thank you for your review and your hints.
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
texanpauline
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 29, 2008 |
|
Unfair review by grinner666, I think. Spelling and grammar are OK. Actually not a bad story at all. Not really my thing, but good rating appropriate. (9/10)
|
|
- Replied by:
DemonX
(Edit) (Apr 6, 2008)
- Thank you. I really appreciate your comment
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
grinner666
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 28, 2008 |
|
Three words: Learn. To. Spell. (3/10)
|
|
- Replied by:
DemonX
(Edit) (Apr 6, 2008)
- Thanks for the comment. Would be much more helpful if you would also include examples of my mistakes - so that I can learn and improve.
|
|
|