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The Course
Author: Sam E.
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(Added on Aug 12, 2007)
(This month 34184 readers) (Total 67168 readers) |
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20 yr old Flora has screwed up and is being punished. Her task is to complete a "course" but things don't go as planned. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 4 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6.5/10) |
| Average
Rating: (6.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (8/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (5/10) |
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| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 6, 2009 |
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Not a 'bad' story, but the sentences are too short and too many of them start with 'he' or 'she'.
The characters have names, so use them. Also try to make longer sentences instead of the short machine-gun bursts that make the reader feel like watching a ping-pong game.
JJ (6/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 19, 2007 |
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good story but an average read (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
bmtphoenix
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 16, 2007 |
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Decent torture bits and good grammar, but I there's no real STORY there. I feel like you know where this started and how Flora go to this point (how did she become a slave?) but are just forgetting to tell us... (5/10)
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| Reviewer:
chksng19
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 13, 2007 |
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A fine beginning which promises much. I hope you deliver more soon! (8/10)
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