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Rape?
Author: Master S
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(Added on Jul 10, 2005)
(This month 10080 readers) (Total 23598 readers) |
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A man rapes a young woman but is surprised by what happens. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 5 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6.5/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (9/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (3/10) |
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Mar 11, 2007 |
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on one hand it was good, on the other hand not realistic, can't imagine a ldy asking her rapist back, even as a fantasy i do not see it (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
Dododecapod
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 22, 2005 |
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I like it - yet I don't.
The basic rape scenario is very well set up, and your use of the first person POV is good (though you do get mixed up occasionally, you need to watch that, it's distracting and unprofessional). Not great; we could've gotten much deeper inside the male protagonist's mind than we did, really seen what made him tick. But that sort of psychological exploration obviously wasn't what you were looking for, and what we got was good.
The denouement kind of spoils the story for me, though. If he'd killed her, or left her, or been arrested or killed by police, that would have been better, but the "girl who wants to be raped" piece is overdone and unbelievable, excepting the case of "stockholm syndrome" long term captivity.
Still your writing is good and your editing excellent. I will look forward to any other pieces of yours I can find. (8/10)
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- Replied by:
ssprin
(Edit) (Jul 31, 2005)
- Great feedback. Thanks. I have revised the story to take care of some of the issues (tenses) and posted it elsewhere (Not sure how to repost here). But I did the "want to be raped" as a story twist as opposed to something I felt was real. So left that.
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| Reviewer:
BDSgirl
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 12, 2005 |
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while i agree with tina that the grammar needs fixing, that is just editing.
i luv this fantasy! and the flow of the story was good. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
tina.matthews
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 11, 2005 |
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Please dont feel bad or discouraged by my review.My only intention of pointing out mistakes is that you will know where to improve.
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Highly erotic and very imaginative.
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Lacks a lot in terms of grammar. The tenses are all mixed up. (3/10)
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| Reviewer:
crimsonkiss69
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jul 10, 2005 |
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I very much enjoyed..More Please and Ty:p (9/10)
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