|
|
|
|
Family Big Vacation
Author: Pallidan
|
|
(Added on May 31, 2005)
(This month 16238 readers) (Total 32514 readers) |
|
A wife's family is requested to join her husband boss, wife, and son on a vacation trip in the country. A vacation for the boss family that is. |
Ratings and Reviews: |
Number
of Ratings: 6 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
17% |
0% |
33% |
17% |
17% |
0% |
0% |
17% |
0% |
0% |
|
Weighed
Average (?): (4.5/10) |
Average
Rating: (4/10) |
Highest
Rating: (8/10) |
Lowest
Rating: (1/10) |
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
jip
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Feb 11, 2006 |
|
The basics of the story are there, but a more subtil approach and less rough words would make it more believable. With corrections it could be excellent (4/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
rebelfan1
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 4, 2005 |
|
Pallidan continues to post the same plot over and over again. His/her writing and gramatical skills are below a grammer school level. Please learn how to write or find someone to edit your stories. Otherwise, stop posting them because there actually get in the way of searching for good stories. (1/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
just4you11
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 3, 2005 |
|
Good Plot, ending is abrupt.but maybe a new chapter is in the works. (8/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
slaveneedledick
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 2, 2005 |
|
The plot was a good plot but I think the author could have given a little background before jumping right into the story. (5/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
bdsmbill
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 2, 2005 |
|
Like the first reviewer, I would suggest that the author pay better attention in English class. The author has a great imagination and a talent in regard to the plot, but the lack of language skill overshadows everything else. If you were a carpenter, you would expect to be able to use a saw and hammer with some skill. Language is the tool of the writer. Learn to use it, and you'll be pretty good. (3/10)
|
|
|
|
|
Reviewer:
daemongem
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jun 2, 2005 |
|
This story has a decent plot, but it is terribly written. Most notable are the lack of any quotation marks. It makes a story extremely difficullt to read if you can't tell where a character's dialogue starts and ends. If just this were fixed, I would be inclined to raise the rating significantly. The story did look spell-checked, by which I was impressed. There are a couple errors (like extraneous "ly") that would require proofreading to catch. (3/10)
|
|
|