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Fun on an Airplane
Author: Samantha Vishevsky
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(Added on May 20, 2005)
(This month 11786 readers) (Total 31996 readers) |
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An innocent and sexy 15 year old girl takes a flight to visit family. While on the plane, she is blackmailed by the man sitting next to her. She is able to save herself by allowing him to do whatever he desires to her body during the flight. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 6 |
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Weighed
Average (?):  (6.5/10) |
Average
Rating:  (7/10) |
| Highest
Rating: (7/10) |
Lowest
Rating:  (6/10) |
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| Reviewer:
Breannefun
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 23, 2005 |
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This was a good start for the most part. Writing erotica is an art and it takes practice First of all you did a relatively good job with grammar and wording. Descriptions were relatively well done. A good author however, finds a way to tell the audience about the character without reprinting their personal ad from the newspaper "She had long auburn hair and blue eyes. She was average height, 5”5, but often wore high heels. Her weight was 118 pounds. Her breast size was 34B" To mechanical. Take the time to describe her using other means. The next issue I have is with GHB. Check out your facts first. GHB is a much more serious drug, and the effects you described were not quite right with what I've seen. I guess the truly unbelievable part was her total submission, to the point where she was calling herself a bunch of nasty names. That wouldn't happen with GHB. If a real drug doesn't exist for what you want to happen, make one up. Its fiction! :) Lastly, as someone who has frequently been face down on other people's laps, I have to tell you that a full bladder is ALWAYS pressed against in that position. She would have no choice about going to the bathroom at that point. Like I said earlier, a nice start. Keep going, cause I think the further adventures of Sierra would be really nice to read! (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
shred97
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 21, 2005 |
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This was a fun little story. It was a great airplane fantasy. (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 21, 2005 |
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altho the story was somwhat odd, nor real believeable the chapter where way to short i hope as you continue this story if you do that you add in more detail and make the chapters longer (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
lex ludite
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 21, 2005 |
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This one has its moments. Let's face it, this is a fantasy so why not just sit back and enjoy the brief ride. For a debut this isn't half bad. Welcome to the fun house. (6/10)
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| Reviewer:
rce
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 21, 2005 |
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Not your average story and well written. Keep up the good work, SV! (7/10)
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| Reviewer:
miscolata
(Edit) |
Rating: |
May 21, 2005 |
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A good start - this is your first posted story right? Very well done.
Although I've never taken GHB myself (just not into drugs), it occurs to me that it should have had a much stronger effect on her thought processes during the episode - from what I gather it's a very powerful drug. Maybe a bit more research would have helped? (of the looking it up and reading kind, not of the trying it for yourself kind of course). (6/10)
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