|
|
|
|
|
Baby
Author: Allene Blake
|
| |
(Added on Apr 5, 2001)
(This month 26464 readers) (Total 63256 readers) |
| |
after breakup mom remarries. stepdad introduces both to spanking and other things, then step-sons return to take baby on to further adventures. |
| Ratings and Reviews: |
| Number
of Ratings: 5 |
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
| 1 |
2 |
3 |
4 |
5 |
6 |
7 |
8 |
9 |
10 |
| 0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
0% |
60% |
40% |
|
Weighed
Average (?):  (9/10) |
Average
Rating:  (9.5/10) |
Highest
Rating:  (10/10) |
| Lowest
Rating: (9/10) |
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
poeticjustace
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 14, 2016 |
| |
loved the story hope theres a conteuation story for this one (10/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
Dryhill
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 5, 2012 |
| |
An enjoyable story. (9/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
JimmyJump
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 21, 2009 |
| |
I liked it a lot. Story has a certain childlike naïvité emanating from it, both in atmosphere as in the choice of words. Which is very well done as it's the daughter who's retelling the tale.
JJ (9/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
mkemse
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Jan 16, 2009 |
| |
excellent (10/10)
|
|
|
|
|
| Reviewer:
e.e. norcod
(Edit) |
Rating: |
Aug 21, 2003 |
| |
I suspect that the reason that this story has gone so long without a review is that everybody loved it yet was unwilling to say what has to be said - THIS STORY NEEDS A EDIT!
One of Allene's best stories, a near masterpiece of erotic SM fantasy. And Allene may be my favorite writer. However it cries out for a rewrite.
This story badly to be divided into chapters, somewhere between five and six with suitable titles and perhaps a bit of an introductory paragraph to each.
The willow switches are a little bit anachronistic. The ranch appears to be somewhere in Southwest Texas or New Mexico. Out there even in the stream beds only cottonwoods would grow. The place is too dry for even live oak, the basal shoot of which make great switches. Perhaps there are some crepe myrtle planted around the ranch house. Old crepe myrtle have shoot that would work. Also cane berries are not found in that climate.
Spice up the local color a bit. Describe the plants and topography.
I am suprised that prickly pear cactus thorns were not employed in Baby's experiences. The kind of climate described in this story fosters the growth of some of the meanest thorns in existance.
Lastly, the ending is flat. Needs a punchier ending. Perhaps joint punishmment of mom and baby.
In summary, I think that this story has the potential to be one of the greatest all time erotic, light S&M tales. Baby is possibly Allene finest character. She deserves a retitle, and republication as a serial. I predict 100,000 hits. (9/10)
|
|
|
About 