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Skirt Day - by C. Maxwell
Chapter one: how it began
Lisa wondered why it was that despite her successful career in
middle management and a plethora of dating options consequent to
her tall, blond good looks, she still felt empty and unhappy. In
fact she didn't much like dating - all too often she would find
the guy's shallow attempts to impress, to make her laugh, and to
get into her jeans to be frustratingly unsatisfying. She usually
delivered a forceful rejection to each guy, and even went on to
instruct him on how to improve his life.
Her career was taking off - she felt a promotion coming - and with
a recent raise and no children, a paid-off house and car, and
fully paid student loans, she had all the money she needed and
more; an indication of 26 years of hard work and little play, she
thought. Why not more happiness from such early stability and
success? This she asked her recently hired therapist, Joan.
After several weeks, Joan found it a major breakthrough when she
realized that Lisa's dating disappointments - and perhaps business
disappointments as well - came from her displeasure at docile
partners. Joan explained her theory to Lisa: you find forceful
men attractive, but you are so self-confident that you are too
forceful with them to allow them to assert themselves.
Joan thought of a potential therapy for Lisa. She began asking
Lisa questions about how she could tone down her aggressive
stature. One session, Joan had an idea:
"Lisa - I notice that at every session, you are always dressed
quite similarly. Baggy jeans, a dark-colored blouse or sweater.
You never dress in a particularly . . . feminine way," Joan asked,
looking for something.
"I prefer to dress this way. It's comfortable."
"And fairly gender neutral . . ."
"So?"
"So, why don't you ever wear a dress? Maybe a low-cut top? High
heels?"
"I don't think I would be taken seriously if I wore those things.
People would think I was, you know, just a girl."
"Do you even own any dresses?"
"I have one floor-length evening gown that I bought for a
Christmas party some years back, and another that I've had since
high school."
"Floor length? I'll bet it was more conservative than the other
dresses at the party."
"Of course. Many of the wives of the employees wore short little
cocktail dresses. You could just see the men looking at their
legs and breasts the whole time. I would never wear something
like that to an office party. What if my colleagues saw up my
skirt? They should be talking to /me/, not my breasts."
"Maybe so. But Lisa - I think this might be a route to explore
ways to enrich your life. I think you box yourself in too much.
You are always so concerned about earning respect and being the
leader. It even cuts into your wardrobe. But your wardrobe is
one of the easiest things we can augment. So, doctor's orders, I
want you to try this: after today's session, I want you to go
shopping. I want you to find something feminine - a dress or a
skirt - to wear to our next session."
"That shouldn't be hard."
"Actually, it should be, so I'm going to make it a little harder
on you. I want it to be short. Well above the knee. I want you
to buy a skirt that seems just long enough to you, but absolutely
no longer, and wear it here with bare legs. The weather is plenty
warm for it."
"You're not wearing a skirt, Joan. Why should I?"
"I almost always wear a skirt on a date. Do you?"
"No."
"Well, there you go."
That afternoon, Lisa went shopping, figuring she must be paying
her therapist for something. She had not worn a skirt above the
knee since childhood - and then she never liked the threat of
being exposed and teased by the boys. But she was an adult now
and she could handle it.
She tried on about 5 skirts and ultimately ended up buying a dark
green, loose a-line skirt that fell to just above her knees. She
put it in her closet and forgot about it until her session a week
later. As she shaved her legs that morning, it occurred to her
that although she shaved her legs almost every morning, there was
never really any point until today.
The feeling of going outside with her legs no longer safely
wrapped by denim or cotton pants, or at least knee-length shorts,
was one she had not felt in a while. She could feel the slightly
cool air on her knees and thighs as she took the subway to her
session, and she knew that she looked more feminine, more exposed,
more weak than her usual self. But there was something else.
"What else?" asked Joan.
"I guess I do feel more attractive. That's the point of this,
right?"
"That's part of it. It is very nice looking, although you still
look quite conservative. What I want for you, Lisa, is to feel
/vulnerable/. I think that's what you're missing."
"Feeling vulnerable doesn't sound like a good thing."
"I think for you, it will be. Do you have a date next week?"
"No."
"An important business meeting?"
"Just one departmental meeting. Why?"
"This is what I want you to do: tomorrow, take your new skirt to a
tailor. Ask him to shorten it by 4 inches. Don't try it on for
him, just ask him to do it. Ask him to call you when it's done.
Then, the day he calls you, whatever day it is, you pick it up.
And then the next day will be important. On that day you will
wear the skirt, again with bare legs. You will wear it even
though it will feel too short for you. You will do this because I
told you. And whenever you wear that skirt, I want you to try to
be passive. I want you to do whatever anyone tells you, whether
it be a coworker, a friend, or even a stranger. So that as you
wear that skirt, you are labeling yourself as a humble servant, at
the mercy of the world. Of course, it's really our secret that
you will do what anyone asks, but that won't change the /feeling/
of it. Do you think you can do that?"
Lisa was shocked. She did not know if she could do it. But it
sounded like a challenge. She thought about it, and Joan added
"I dare you to do it, Lisa."
So it was a challenge! Lisa believed nothing was too difficult
for her, so this shouldn't be, either.
"Remember, when you wear that skirt, you will do whatever anyone
asks, starting with putting on the skirt in the morning and
wearing it all day."
The tailor gave Lisa a slightly funny look when she asked to have
her perfectly nice skirt shortened, but would only tell, not show,
how short. Lisa felt a little embarrassed, but she did not let it
bother her since it wasn't her idea.
For the beginning of the week, Lisa felt a great anticipation for
her "skirt day." She resolved that she would indeed do what
anyone told her (not that anyone would, since no one would know
that they could) and the thought somehow excited her. She
rationalized that it was the danger of it. It's highly unlikely
that a stranger on the street could stop her and ask her to strip
naked and have sex with him, but if he did, she would /have/ to.
The more Lisa thought about it, the more simultaneous dread and
excitement filled her. On Tuesday she picked up the skirt, which
looked noticeably smaller in her hands although she did not try it
on. On Tuesday night she had a little trouble sleeping, wondering
what would happen the next day.
Wednesday morning. Lisa wakes up, showers, shaves her legs,
brushes her teeth, takes her birth control pill, and returns to
the bedroom. Wrapped in plastic is her fate for the day, hanging
next to the white blouse she planned to wear with it. She picks
out her favorite set of underwear - somewhat high cut white
panties and a bra with just a little push to it. She buttons up
the blouse (all but the collar button), and then removes the skirt
from the plastic. She slides it up her legs, and when the hem
reaches her knees she realizes that the waistband is still half a
foot from her waist. She slides it higher and when finally she
fastens the button at the waist she feels that her legs are almost
entirely exposed. She wonders after all if she can go through
with this!
She looks in the mirror. The skirt only covers half of her
thighs. She feels exposed, vulnerable, and anxious. She turns
around and bends over. It's hard to tell in the mirror, but she's
confident her panties are still covered, even though the backs of
her thighs are in plain view. She tries sitting down, exposing
more thigh as the skirt rides up. "This is how it will be all
day," she says. She knows she has to go through with it now.
Then she feels it: with the vulnerability comes excitement. What
will happen to her? What adventures will befall her now that so
much of her is exposed? It seems very different, slightly scary,
and above all, /alive/. As she puts on a pair of flat sandals she
purchased yesterday, grabs her purse, and walks out the door,
locking her house and her pants behind her, she pulls down her
skirt as far as it goes, swallows her fear, and realizes why she
has been paying Joan all this time. For the first time in years,
she is looking forward to her day.
